September is Pain Awareness Month.
And because chronic pain is part of my life, I knew I wanted to talk about it here on Radiant Rise.
But I didn't want to create a month of posts that basically say:
Pain exists.
We know.
The conversation I want to have is about what happens around the pain.
The parts that don't fit neatly into a pain scale.
The decisions.
The adaptations.
The misunderstandings.
The good days.
The difficult days.
And the very ordinary-looking days somewhere in between.
Chronic Pain Is Part of My Life. It Isn't My Entire Life.
This distinction matters to me.
I live with chronic pain.
I also work.
Laugh.
Love people.
Get annoyed.
Make plans.
Change plans.
Create things.
Have responsibilities.
Get excited about things.
Watch ridiculous television.
Have good days.
And live an entire life that can't be summarized by a diagnosis.
I don't want awareness to flatten people into their pain.
I want it to do the opposite.
I want us to understand how much life can exist alongside it.
There's a Lot You Don't See
Chronic pain can involve an enormous number of tiny calculations that nobody around you realizes you're making.
Can I stand this long?
Where can I sit?
How much energy do I have?
If I go there, how far will I need to walk?
What am I doing tomorrow?
Do I have time to recover?
What can wait?
What absolutely can't?
Is this worth it?
And sometimes the answer to that last question is:
Yes.
Even knowing there may be consequences.
Because people with chronic pain still want experiences.
We still want memories.
We still want normal moments.
Sometimes pain gets a vote.
But I don't want it automatically making every decision in my life.
Awareness Shouldn't Require Performing Pain
There's something else I want this series to challenge.
The idea that someone has to look sick enough to deserve understanding.
Pain doesn't always announce itself.
Sometimes someone is clearly struggling.
Sometimes you'd never know.
A smile isn't a medical report.
Neither is a photograph.
Neither is showing up for work.
Neither is going somewhere fun.
And neither is staying home.
That's one of the conversations we'll get into more deeply throughout this series.
Good Days Count Too
Pain awareness shouldn't erase joy.
That's important.
If I have a good day, I want to enjoy the hell out of that good day.
I don't want to worry that someone will see me laughing and decide:
Oh, she must be better.
Maybe I'm having a better day.
Fantastic.
Let me have it.
A good day doesn't invalidate the difficult ones.
And a difficult day doesn't mean every day will always feel that way.
Both can exist.
What I Want From This Month
I don't expect everyone reading Radiant Rise to understand what chronic pain feels like.
How could you if you haven't experienced it?
I'm not asking for that.
What I hope we can build is understanding without requiring identical experience.
Listen when someone tells you something hurts.
Believe that what you see isn't necessarily the whole story.
Ask instead of assuming.
Don't automatically treat changed plans as a lack of caring.
Don't measure today's ability against yesterday's.
And remember that the person standing in front of you is still a whole person—not a diagnosis.
This Month, We're Talking About the Part You Don't Always See
Throughout this Pain Awareness Month series, we're going to talk about chronic pain from several different angles.
Not clinically.
Not perfectly.
And definitely not as though my experience represents everybody else's.
I'm sharing mine.
And I'm creating room for other people to share theirs.
Because awareness shouldn't just mean knowing chronic pain exists.
It should mean becoming a little better at seeing, listening to and supporting the people living with it.
So that's where we're starting.
Not with pity.
Not with assumptions.
With a conversation.
Awareness starts with listening.
— Michelle
Radiant Rise
Healing. Growing. Rising Together.
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